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Scuba Forum / General / July 2006Floating websites?
Can anyone recommend any good sites on learning how to float and swim? Ones with diagrams would be best. > Can anyone recommend any good sites on learning how to float and swim? > Ones with diagrams would be best. Sure. The best site to learn how to float and swim is with an instructor at your local municipal or YMCA pool. Lee >> Can anyone recommend any good sites on learning how to float and swim? >> Ones with diagrams would be best. [quoted text clipped - 3 lines] > >Lee Still pushing that huh? >>> Can anyone recommend any good sites on learning how to float and swim? >>> Ones with diagrams would be best. [quoted text clipped - 6 lines] > > Still pushing that huh? He's not wrong.  SignaturePopeye "Best thing for him, really, his therapy was going nowhere." -Dr. Hannibal Lector. www.finalprotectivefire.com >> Still pushing that huh? > > He's not wrong. I'm not saying that's not the best way. I'm just saying it's not essential. And I don't like people pushing me into it the way he did. He could've recommended it if he wanted to, but don't lay it on me. And if he wanted he could've also given some advice on practicing yourself. > >> Still pushing that huh? > > > > He's not wrong. > > I'm not saying that's not the best way. I'm just saying it's not > essential. Funny, I don't recall him saying ti was essential either. > And I don't like people pushing me into it the way he did. He didn't push you into anything. > He could've recommended it if he wanted to, He did. > but don't lay it on me. WTH? > And if he wanted he could've also given some advice on practicing > yourself. That's not exactly the safest manner to learn how to swim. It's fine for teaching yourself to play the guitar or play golf, but when you are talking about learning to swim, you're talking about a possible life threatening situation. If you can't swim, I highly recommend that you DON'T try to teach yourself. If it works for you, congratulations. If it doesn't, we'll probably never know. >> >> Still pushing that huh? >> > [quoted text clipped - 26 lines] >teach yourself. If it works for you, congratulations. If it doesn't, we'll >probably never know. Ah another Nazi swimmer. Anyway you sure don't know how to read between the lines do you? > Ah another Nazi swimmer. Anyway you sure don't know how to read > between the lines do you? And thus Godwin's Law can be invoked... http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Godwin's_law You lose... Off to the penalty box with you, wee one... http://www.geocities.com/grumman581/welcome-rec-scuba.htm <snip> > Ah another Nazi swimmer. Anyway you sure don't know how to read > between the lines do you? Nazi swimmer? Hardly. Having been a lifeguard for about half my lifetime I've seen what can happen to those people who get in over their head. Having been a swimming instructor for about the same amount of time, I have seen how much easier it is to learn with an instructor. If your experiences thus far with swimming instruction have been unacceptable, perhaps you should try to locate a different instructor. If many different instructors don't work for you, perhaps it's not the instructors who are the problem? What did I miss "between the lines"? > I'm not saying that's not the best way. I'm just saying it's not > essential. And I don't like people pushing me into it the way he did. > He could've recommended it if he wanted to, but don't lay it on me. > And if he wanted he could've also given some advice on practicing > yourself. I suspect that most people learn to swim when they are younger... Learning when you are older is probably more difficult since your brain probably keeps telling you that it is not possible and you will sink... If you're going to try to teach yourself how to swim, at least have someone watching over you who can rescue you once you start to drown... >I suspect that most people learn to swim when they are younger... >Learning when you are older is probably more difficult since your >brain probably keeps telling you that it is not possible and you will >sink... If you're going to try to teach yourself how to swim, at least >have someone watching over you who can rescue you once you start to >drown... Sure will, lot's of people probably minding their own business, having fun swimming and screaming, and no one to hear me if I start drowning lol. > and no one to hear me if I start drowning We can only hope. >> and no one to hear me if I start drowning > >We can only hope. I hope an orca eats you and sh.ts you out. But not before slapping you around a dozen times with his tail. > >> and no one to hear me if I start drowning > > > >We can only hope. > > I hope an orca eats you and sh.ts you out. But not before slapping you > around a dozen times with his tail. So you don't mind being dead as long as someone else gets insulted along the way? >>I suspect that most people learn to swim when they are younger... >>Learning when you are older is probably more difficult since your [quoted text clipped - 6 lines] >fun swimming and screaming, and no one to hear me if I start drowning >lol. That's what an instructor is for. Did you learn to read and write on your own? How about differential equations? You are wanting to learn something (float) that you either can do or can't. There's no learning it and you're a fool if you think otherwise. Signaturedillon JAFO >I suspect that most people learn to swim when they are younger... >Learning when you are older is probably more difficult since your >brain probably keeps telling you that it is not possible and you will >sink... If you're going to try to teach yourself how to swim, at least >have someone watching over you who can rescue you once you start to >drown... Like an instructor. I spend a few years as a lifeguard and swimming instructor. Hell, teaching kids is easy. You tell them what to do, they do it. They don't know they can't. Teaching adults is no fun at all. As you suggest, they have years of learning that they can't swim to undo before they find out that they can. > That's what an instructor is for. Did you learn to read and write on > your own? How about differential equations? Nobody really learns differential equations. You just buy a book full of formulas and learn how to look things up in it. Lee >> I suspect that most people learn to swim when they are younger... >> Learning when you are older is probably more difficult since your [quoted text clipped - 4 lines] > > Like an instructor. Does one really need an instructor to learn how to swim? I honestly don't know, I'm just asking. I taught myself. Actually, I did't even teach myself, I just got in the water and did it. > >> I suspect that most people learn to swim when they are younger... > >> Learning when you are older is probably more difficult since your [quoted text clipped - 8 lines] > don't know, I'm just asking. I taught myself. Actually, I did't even > teach myself, I just got in the water and did it. Yeah - I could move myself in the water, but couldn't swim efficiently so I started taking lessons. Dennis > > Does one really need an instructor to learn how to swim? I honestly > > don't know, I'm just asking. I taught myself. Actually, I did't even > > teach myself, I just got in the water and did it. > > Yeah - I could move myself in the water, but couldn't swim efficiently so I > started taking lessons. Sounds pretty similar to me. Like most, I learned the basics family, etc. But it wasn't until I had to take a swimming test at summer camp one year that the concept of "different swimming strokes" came up. I'm glad that it happened, because I didn't know any resting strokes, and these are extremely valuable for drownproofing...as well as swimming long distances (there was a 1/2 mile swim test if you wanted to be able to use the canoes). OTOH, my wife's experience was pretty negative. Her attitude is that the YMCA wasted her time by teaching her nothing more than 15 different ways of how to dive into a pool. In the end, like scuba instruction - - its the instructor that makes the difference, and if the structure of an organized group class isn't what they want, then private lessons will do it. -hh >> > Does one really need an instructor to learn how to swim? I honestly >> > don't know, I'm just asking. I taught myself. Actually, I did't even [quoted text clipped - 10 lines] >swimming long distances (there was a 1/2 mile swim test if you wanted >to be able to use the canoes). I hate the breast stroke, it's very faggy and unmanly. There are many kinds of strokes that look very stupid. I mean don't get me wrong, if it's the most efficient way to survive I'll do it, but it seems there are so many, or too many. Every time I see a video with all kinds of stroke techniques I'm like god damn it's gonna take me years to learn all of this on this tape. All you need to know are the best ones for survival, anything extra is just flamboyance or something. >OTOH, my wife's experience was pretty negative. Her attitude is that >the YMCA wasted her time by teaching her nothing more than 15 different [quoted text clipped - 5 lines] > >-hh Why would anyone need scuba instruction? Ok maybe you could use a little instruction to go faster but you got a tank full of air and all you have to do is swim underwater. I mean for me swimming underneath water is very easy and fast. It's swimming on top that's harder and slower. Well at least for me, I don't know about others. As for private lessons, I'm sure they're very costly. An hour for one student? They'll probably charge you a lot. > >> > Does one really need an instructor to learn how to swim? I honestly > >> > don't know, I'm just asking. I taught myself. Actually, I did't even [quoted text clipped - 18 lines] > all of this on this tape. All you need to know are the best ones for > survival, anything extra is just flamboyance or something. Well, thats why its a good thing to have an instructor. A good one can cut that tiem down drastically, presuming of course that the student is willing to learn. And with you, I doubt that is the case. > >OTOH, my wife's experience was pretty negative. Her attitude is that > >the YMCA wasted her time by teaching her nothing more than 15 different [quoted text clipped - 9 lines] > little instruction to go faster but you got a tank full of air and all > you have to do is swim underwater. I mean for me swimming underneath Well, you have to breeathe too. Answer this - at what point, while having breathed compressed air, is it safe to hold your breath while ascending? > water is very easy and fast. It's swimming on top that's harder and > slower. Well at least for me, I don't know about others. There's a reason for that. Dennis >>>>> Does one really need an instructor to learn how to swim? I honestly >>>>> don't know, I'm just asking. I taught myself. Actually, I did't [quoted text clipped - 38 lines] > Answer this - at what point, while having breathed compressed air, is it > safe to hold your breath while ascending? Would it be irresponsible for me to answer that differently for him than everyone else? <snip> > > Well, you have to breeathe too. > > Answer this - at what point, while having breathed compressed air, is it > > safe to hold your breath while ascending? > > Would it be irresponsible for me to answer that differently for him than > everyone else? :-) Dennis > > >> > Does one really need an instructor to learn how to swim? I honestly > > >> > don't know, I'm just asking. I taught myself. Actually, I did't [quoted text clipped - 42 lines] > Answer this - at what point, while having breathed compressed air, is it > safe to hold your breath while ascending? erm... once you've gotten to the surface and are treading water while trying to raise your head farther out of the water (like water polo players do)? > > water is very easy and fast. It's swimming on top that's harder and > > slower. Well at least for me, I don't know about others. > > There's a reason for that. > > Dennis <snip> > > Well, you have to breeathe too. > > Answer this - at what point, while having breathed compressed air, is it > > safe to hold your breath while ascending? > > erm... once you've gotten to the surface and are treading water while trying > to raise your head farther out of the water (like water polo players do)? :-) Dennis > Why would anyone need scuba instruction? Ok maybe you could use a > little instruction to go faster but you got a tank full of air and all [quoted text clipped - 4 lines] > As for private lessons, I'm sure they're very costly. An hour for one > student? They'll probably charge you a lot. The first question says it ALL! <snip> > As for private lessons, I'm sure they're very costly. An hour for one > student? They'll probably charge you a lot. And you'd be wrong. > <snip> >> >> As for private lessons, I'm sure they're very costly. An hour for one >> student? They'll probably charge you a lot. > > And you'd be wrong. It's okay, he's used to it. SignaturePopeye "Best thing for him, really, his therapy was going nowhere." -Dr. Hannibal Lector. www.finalprotectivefire.com >> <snip> >>> [quoted text clipped - 4 lines] > > It's okay, he's used to it. Actually no, I'm always right :) > >> <snip> > >>> [quoted text clipped - 6 lines] > > Actually no, I'm always right :) Wrong again. Dennis >>><snip> >>> [quoted text clipped - 6 lines] > > Actually no, I'm always right :) You haven't been right yet > Actually no, I'm always right :) I'm never wrong. Once, I thought I was, but I was mistaken. >> Actually no, I'm always right :) > >I'm never wrong. Once, I thought I was, but I was mistaken. Man that's deep. But I'm 80 years old, either I'm right, or I'll never learn. > >> Actually no, I'm always right :) > > > >I'm never wrong. Once, I thought I was, but I was mistaken. > > Man that's deep. But I'm 80 years old, either I'm right, or I'll never > learn. Then why did you ask where you could learn how to float? Either you already know (and you're right) or you'll never learn, right? >>>Actually no, I'm always right :) >> >>I'm never wrong. Once, I thought I was, but I was mistaken. > > Man that's deep. But I'm 80 years old, either I'm right, or I'll never > learn. You mispelled 8 years old again >> Actually no, I'm always right :) > >I'm never wrong. Once, I thought I was, but I was mistaken. now you sound like Toni from Northland... > As for private lessons (for Otter), I'm sure they're very costly. An hour > for one > student? They'll probably charge you a lot. He doesn't have enough money to pay what I'd charge. Lee ><snip> >> >> As for private lessons, I'm sure they're very costly. An hour for one >> student? They'll probably charge you a lot. > >And you'd be wrong. You must be Lee's cousin or something. >> <snip> >>> As for private lessons, I'm sure they're very costly. An hour for one >>> student? They'll probably charge you a lot. >> And you'd be wrong. > > You must be Lee's cousin or something. No, I'm just someone who had private diving lessons. In fact, they didn't charge by the hour. It was a lot less than I charge for flight lessons, believe me. >>> <snip> >>>> As for private lessons, I'm sure they're very costly. An hour for one [quoted text clipped - 6 lines] >didn't charge by the hour. It was a lot less than I charge for flight >lessons, believe me. No sh.t. That's one hobby where learning is nominally more expensive than doing. Until you buy that P210. Or you can get a combination deal, a V35 and a farm. Signaturedillon JAFO > > ... > >I'm glad that it happened, because I didn't know any resting strokes, > >and these are extremely valuable for drownproofing...as well as > >swimming long distances.. > > I hate the breast stroke, it's very faggy and unmanly. Like any swimming stroke, it can be highly useful in certain circumstances. > There are many > kinds of strokes that look very stupid. I mean don't get me wrong, if > it's the most efficient way to survive I'll do it, but it seems there > are so many, or too many. The basics are crawl, breast, back, butterfly, side. Of these, the butterfly is generally considered the hardest and least useful. To pick just one after the crawl, I'd recommend the side, as its the resting stroke where you can see where you're going :-) > Every time I see a video with all kinds of > stroke techniques I'm like god damn it's gonna take me years to learn > all of this on this tape. Amazing thing is that there's a product available today that you can buy that will dramatically speed up how quickly you can learn these skills. Unfortunately, you're too proud (or cheap) to even consider buying it. > All you need to know are the best ones for > survival, anything extra is just flamboyance or something. The fancy crap is for competition, and you're right - - its not needed. > >In the end, like scuba instruction - - its the instructor that makes > >the difference, and if the structure of an organized group class isn't > >what they want, then private lessons will do it. > > Why would anyone need scuba instruction? http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Analogy > As for private lessons, I'm sure they're very costly. An hour for one > student? They'll probably charge you a lot. Its all relative: "time is money", so when you don't want to spend the time, you end up spending the money. Its up to you to choose the balance, and you won't know the answer for sure until you research your local service providers. Even in NYC, I'd bet that you should be able to find a private instructor for less than $50/hr, although they may have a certain minimum number of instructional hours, and/or require a Membership fee, etc. Do realize that since private instruction is customized, it offers the maximum possible skills improvement rate, which means that each hour of private is usually worth 3-4 hours of a group class. -hh >>>... >>>I'm glad that it happened, because I didn't know any resting strokes, [quoted text clipped - 19 lines] >>stroke techniques I'm like god damn it's gonna take me years to learn >>all of this on this tape. I swam competitively for many years thru college - me least favorite was the butterfly. My favorite the backstroke - it was the easiest for me - the crawl was for me was the most efficient - I still use the breast stroke while diving and not. >>>>... >>>>I'm glad that it happened, because I didn't know any resting strokes, [quoted text clipped - 24 lines] >me - the crawl was for me was the most efficient - I still use the >breast stroke while diving and not. A few years ago I swam across Travis doing the backstroke. It's a lazy stroke and you're floating on your back. The only problem was there's no stripe on the ceiling to tell you if you're going straight. But if you're going to swim across Travis you're going to need a guard boat. Signaturedillon JAFO <snip> > A few years ago I swam across Travis doing the backstroke. It's a > lazy stroke and you're floating on your back. The only problem was > there's no stripe on the ceiling to tell you if you're going straight. > But if you're going to swim across Travis you're going to need a guard > boat. and sunglasses or smoke lensed goggles. :-) > >> > Does one really need an instructor to learn how to swim? I honestly > >> > don't know, I'm just asking. I taught myself. Actually, I did't even [quoted text clipped - 12 lines] > > I hate the breast stroke, it's very faggy and unmanly. hehe... I swam the breaststroke competitively in high school. If you had done the same, you wouldn't say what you just said. I also swam the butterfly. If there's a more "manly" stroke than butterfly, I don't know what it is. > There are many > kinds of strokes that look very stupid. I mean don't get me wrong, if > it's the most efficient way to survive I'll do it, but it seems there > are so many, or too many. Every time I see a video with all kinds of > stroke techniques I'm like god damn it's gonna take me years to learn > all of this on this tape. It doesn't take nearly as long as you'd think. I used to teach people freestyle (American crawl), trudgeon, sidestroke, backstroke, elementary backstroke, and breaststroke in a five hour time span during the summers. During that same timespan, they learned how to dive (from the side of the pool as wella s a diving board), use their clothing as a personal floatation device (its quite an interesting feat if you've never seen it), and a myriad of other topics. The key was actually having someone watching who could correct your mistakes and make it easier to learn. >> >> > Does one really need an instructor to learn how to swim? I honestly >> >> > don't know, I'm just asking. I taught myself. Actually, I did't [quoted text clipped - 20 lines] >same, you wouldn't say what you just said. I also swam the butterfly. If >there's a more "manly" stroke than butterfly, I don't know what it is. Oh I guess you mean because it's hard too do. If that's what you mean then I agree. But it looks stupid, it seems like you're wasting a lot of energy for each stroke and not getting anywhere, and also it has a faggy name. It sounds like it's for women :) >> There are many >> kinds of strokes that look very stupid. I mean don't get me wrong, if [quoted text clipped - 11 lines] >of other topics. The key was actually having someone watching who could >correct your mistakes and make it easier to learn. Ahh caught another former instructor! I knew it, I said it before. Anyway I guess one can learn the ones you say. I'd say 10 is the limit. I mean your not gonna do all 10 if you're drowning right? But I've seen tapes where they've got like 50 (ok maybe I'm exagerrating). It's probably just to sell more tapes. > >> >> > Does one really need an instructor to learn how to swim? I honestly > >> >> > don't know, I'm just asking. I taught myself. Actually, I did't [quoted text clipped - 25 lines] > of energy for each stroke and not getting anywhere, and also it has a > faggy name. It sounds like it's for women :) When properly executed, it doesn't look stupid. It is much less energy efficient than freestyle, but if you are good at it, you can actually swim faster using the butterfly stroke than you can using the freestyle (American crawl) stroke. Also, swimming butterfly gives you a wonderful mix of upper body strength and endurance. > >> There are many > >> kinds of strokes that look very stupid. I mean don't get me wrong, if [quoted text clipped - 13 lines] > > Ahh caught another former instructor! You didn't catch anything. Had you been paying attention, you would have seen where I referenced this earlier. > I knew it, I said it before. > Anyway I guess one can learn the ones you say. I'd say 10 is the > limit. I mean your not gonna do all 10 if you're drowning right? If you're drowning, you're not going to be doing any... if you were doing one, it would be called "swimming". > But I've seen tapes where they've got like 50 (ok maybe I'm exagerrating). > It's probably just to sell more tapes. It's absolutely to sell more tapes. 99% of the population never needs to learn more than four or five strokes. >> >> > Does one really need an instructor to learn how to swim? I honestly >> >> > don't know, I'm just asking. I taught myself. Actually, I did't [quoted text clipped - 36 lines] >of other topics. The key was actually having someone watching who could >correct your mistakes and make it easier to learn. Watched a girl jump in to do the last who wasn't wearing a bra. Very interesting. I think she did it on purpose. Signaturedillon JAFO > >> >> > Does one really need an instructor to learn how to swim? I honestly > >> >> > don't know, I'm just asking. I taught myself. Actually, I did't [quoted text clipped - 39 lines] > Watched a girl jump in to do the last who wasn't wearing a bra. Very > interesting. I think she did it on purpose. In the method I taught , it wouldn't have mattered. The "drowner" never removes their shirt. It's too bad I wasn't there to witness the episode you saw. :-) Unfortunately, I'm not sure how effective the method I taught would be in a real situation since it requires both pants and a long sleeve shirt. You don't see many people around water in Texas in pants AND a long sleeved shirt. I however have gotten very proficient at the task. I can inflate my shirt, remove my shoes and pants, configure my pants to hold air, and inflate the pants in about 3 minutes. If I ever make it to a Dive with Greg (or similar), I'll demonstrate if anybody is interested. I won't wear a bra either. :-) >> >> >> > Does one really need an instructor to learn how to swim? I >honestly [quoted text clipped - 58 lines] >(or similar), I'll demonstrate if anybody is interested. I won't wear a bra >either. :-) Ahh now I see why a lot of you become instructors, you do it all for the "take off all your clothes now! it will save your lives!" technique. <snip> > Ahh now I see why a lot of you become instructors, you do it all for > the "take off all your clothes now! it will save your lives!" > technique. Being that I was teaching this technique at a Boy Scout Camp, I can assure you that it was NOT for the "take off your clothes" effect. ><snip> > [quoted text clipped - 4 lines] >Being that I was teaching this technique at a Boy Scout Camp, I can assure >you that it was NOT for the "take off your clothes" effect. Haha. I bet it was, but I won't tell anybody ;) > ><snip> > > [quoted text clipped - 6 lines] > > Haha. I bet it was, but I won't tell anybody ;) Haha... if you saw my wife, you'd take that bet back. >> ><snip> >> > [quoted text clipped - 9 lines] > >Haha... if you saw my wife, you'd take that bet back. I have already ;) > >> ><snip> > >> > [quoted text clipped - 11 lines] > > I have already ;) You've already taken the bet back and still haven't seen my wife. That's good stuff right there. :-) >> >> ><snip> >> >> > [quoted text clipped - 14 lines] >You've already taken the bet back and still haven't seen my wife. That's >good stuff right there. :-) haha. Ok I'll leave it alone. >>> >> ><snip> >>> >> > [quoted text clipped - 16 lines] > >haha. Ok I'll leave it alone. How about we get this one to 100 too. You scumbags. > > > Does one really need an instructor to learn how to swim? I honestly > > > don't know, I'm just asking. I taught myself. Actually, I did't even [quoted text clipped - 10 lines] > swimming long distances (there was a 1/2 mile swim test if you wanted > to be able to use the canoes). In my case, I watned to take the Rescue (YMCA calls it SLAM - scuba lifesaving and accident management). My instructor takes this course raher seriously,m and there is a good bit of swimming. Had I not learned the more efficient strokes, I doubt I wouldve passed the test. > OTOH, my wife's experience was pretty negative. Her attitude is that > the YMCA wasted her time by teaching her nothing more than 15 different > ways of how to dive into a pool. That's a shame. > In the end, like scuba instruction - - its the instructor that makes > the difference, and if the structure of an organized group class isn't > what they want, then private lessons will do it. Indeed. Dennis >>> I suspect that most people learn to swim when they are younger... >>> Learning when you are older is probably more difficult since your [quoted text clipped - 8 lines] >don't know, I'm just asking. I taught myself. Actually, I did't even >teach myself, I just got in the water and did it. Of course. Most people already learn how to swim and float as a child with no instructors, I remember most of my friends swimming naturally and I was like the only one who couldn't go into the deep end. I could swim in the shallow end but not go in the deep end. Those people who are scared of the deep end will eventually go to an instructor, like I did. But I learned nothing because it was a crappy course with many people (they're all like that, that's how they make their money), and you don't get any personal time with the instructor. That's why I keep saying no thanks to an instructor. Now with practice by myself eventually I've learned to just swim over the deep end without being afraid, and have finally floated on my back in the shallow end, and guess what with no instructor, just advice from other people swimming with me. I want to learn many floating styles, they're more important than swimming if you want to stay alive if you you ever find yourself in deep water. You can do it by just reading on the net and practicing yourself. Now learning to float in the deep end is a big step, once you get there you know you've conquered the big one. But when I came here I was asking for some technique to go on about practicing that while having some kind of safety net (not litereally a safety net), but then the Nazi instructors came in diving like sharks that have just smelled blood. I think most of these hounds are instructors themselves or former ones. > >>> I suspect that most people learn to swim when they are younger... > >>> Learning when you are older is probably more difficult since your [quoted text clipped - 17 lines] > crappy course with many people (they're all like that, that's how they > make their money), Hint: They're not all like that. > and you don't get any personal time with the > instructor. That's why I keep saying no thanks to an instructor. Now > with practice by myself eventually I've learned to just swim over the > deep end without being afraid, and have finally floated on my back in > the shallow end, and guess what with no instructor, just advice from > other people swimming with me. Hint: Even if it's not a formal "instruction setting", they were instructors. > I want to learn many floating styles, > they're more important than swimming if you want to stay alive if you > you ever find yourself in deep water. If you can float on your back and you can swim, you're good to go. Learning some resting strokes (like sidestroke, elementary backstroke, backstroke, or breaststroke) will be helpful. Wearing a PFD when on the water will help tremendously (whether you can swim or not). > Now learning to float in the deep end is a big step, once you > get there you know you've conquered the big one. Floating in the deep end is *exactly* the same as floating in the shallow end. There's just more water below you. > But when I came here > I was asking for some technique to go on about practicing that while > having some kind of safety net (not litereally a safety net) That's not what you asked. You asked where you could go to learn how to float. We gave you the best answer we knew. Any other answer on our part would have been irresponsible. >> and you don't get any personal time with the >> instructor. That's why I keep saying no thanks to an instructor. Now [quoted text clipped - 5 lines] >Hint: Even if it's not a formal "instruction setting", they were >instructors. Well you should've explained that before. But everybody else saying "instructor" mean a certified one. >> Now learning to float in the deep end is a big step, once you >> get there you know you've conquered the big one. > >Floating in the deep end is *exactly* the same as floating in the shallow >end. There's just more water below you. Yeah well I mean getting over the fear of knowing that you are in deep water and you can drown there. >> But when I came here >> I was asking for some technique to go on about practicing that while [quoted text clipped - 4 lines] >You asked where you could go to learn how to float. We gave you the best >answer we knew. Any other answer on our part would have been irresponsible. I didn't ask where, I asked how. Most people should know the person is not asking about instructors and is talking about techniques. But it's not irresponsible to give advice without talking about instructors. Then there was the manners thing I won't go into again. > >Hint: Even if it's not a formal "instruction setting", they were > >instructors. > > Well you should've explained that before. But everybody else saying > "instructor" mean a certified one. It merely means someone that's reasonably qualified to do what it is that they are to do, in a fairly structured setting, which probably carries the connotations of liability insurance, etc. If it lacks structure, than its more likely that the term would have been "mentor". > >Floating in the deep end is *exactly* the same as floating in the shallow > >end. There's just more water below you. > > Yeah well I mean getting over the fear of knowing that you are in deep > water and you can drown there. All of this floating in deep water has me longing to go take a bluewater excursion off of one of the walls in Little Cayman on a crystal sharp sunny day...100ft of azure blue water above & to the sides and with 1000ft below, floating silently amongst the dancing sunbeams. > >You asked where you could go to learn how to float. We gave you the best > >answer we knew. Any other answer on our part would have been irresponsible. > > I didn't ask where, I asked how. The "how" to the technique is to practice with a spotter who's familiar with the proven techniques as to be able to see and correct your mistakes, as well as to minimize the risk of you accidentally hurting yourself as you strive to attain proficiency. While the colloquial term is "Swimming Instructor", your less offensive and simpler descriptor is: "PPSSHFWBMTHPSFTGPOFWIIAAEWK&STTP". ("Professional Poolside Safety Spotter Highly Familar With Biomechanical Motion Techniques Historically Proven Suitable For The General Prevention Of Fatal Water Ingestion In An Aqueous Environment With Knowledge & Skill Transfer Technique Proficiency" :-) -hh > hh wrote >> I didn't ask where, I asked how. He quite clearly asked for the best site for getting information. that's a where, not a how. I responded with the best site. If he doesn't like the response, tough. I can't comment on whether most recommended a certified instructor, but that certainly is what I meant. Water Safety Instructors, the Red Cross certification for teaching swimming through Senior Lifesaving, is the best source of information on how to float and how to swim. Each student is unique. To teach the skills properly, someone that understands the skills has to observe the student's efforts directly. I stand by my original statement. The best site for information on how to float and swim is in a pool, with an instructor. Lee > I stand by my original statement. The best site for information on how to > float and swim is in a pool, with an instructor. ...and for that you were labeled a "nazi swimmer"....whatever the hell that is. Must be something he picked up on "Southpark" while he was playing with his Barbie Dolls. > >> But when I came here > >> I was asking for some technique to go on about practicing that while [quoted text clipped - 6 lines] > > I didn't ask where, I asked how. "Can anyone recommend any good sites on learning how to float and swim?" The answers generally given were "The YMCA." > Most people should know the person is > not asking about instructors and is talking about techniques. But it's > not irresponsible to give advice without talking about instructors. In most cases, you're absolutely correct. In a few instances, that's blatantly wrong. This was one of those few instances. >>> I suspect that most people learn to swim when they are younger... >>> Learning when you are older is probably more difficult since your [quoted text clipped - 8 lines] >don't know, I'm just asking. I taught myself. Actually, I did't even >teach myself, I just got in the water and did it. I wouldn't say "lots of people", but plenty enough die from teaching themselves to swim. I learned the backstroke first, since it was easy to float on my back. Learned it well enough to compete at collegiate level. I also like the breast stroke, but that's for a different thread. Signaturedillon JAFO >>>> I suspect that most people learn to swim when they are younger... >>>> Learning when you are older is probably more difficult since your [quoted text clipped - 15 lines] > >I also like the breast stroke, but that's for a different thread. whose brest? >>I suspect that most people learn to swim when they are younger... >>Learning when you are older is probably more difficult since your [quoted text clipped - 9 lines] >can't. Teaching adults is no fun at all. As you suggest, they have years >of learning that they can't swim to undo before they find out that they can. Ahh! You biased f.ck, that's why you are the Nazi swimmer, you were an instructor before! And now you are the Nazi former instructor, lol. So you feel compelled to insist on one and feel insulted when someone doesn't want one. sh.t I don't need no instructor just to learn how to tread water, please give me a fuckn break. Do I need an instructor to fart under water too? >> Can anyone recommend any good sites on learning how to float and swim? >> Ones with diagrams would be best. [quoted text clipped - 3 lines] > >Lee So yer like sayin ya gotta actually get in water?!? > Can anyone recommend any good sites on learning how to float and swim? > Ones with diagrams would be best. The YMCA. >> Can anyone recommend any good sites on learning how to float and swim? >> Ones with diagrams would be best. > >The YMCA. Didn't you see the part where I said I don't want to go to the YMCA, you dyslexic fool. I think it's been established that I don't want no damn instructors. Anyone with advice on how to personally learn how to float yourself would be appreciated, no instructor Nazi's please. > >> Can anyone recommend any good sites on learning how to float and swim? > >> Ones with diagrams would be best. [quoted text clipped - 3 lines] > Didn't you see the part where I said I don't want to go to the YMCA, > you dyslexic fool. Actually, I hadn't seen that part yet, although, I have now. > I think it's been established that I don't want no > damn instructors. What are you here for exactly? > Anyone with advice on how to personally learn how to > float yourself would be appreciated, no instructor Nazi's please. So, should I tell you or not? Now I'm confused. > Didn't you see the part where I said I don't want to go to the YMCA, > you dyslexic fool. I think it's been established that I don't want no > damn instructors. Anyone with advice on how to personally learn how to > float yourself would be appreciated, no instructor Nazi's please. You are a lippy little f.ck and a troll, no more, no less. >> Didn't you see the part where I said I don't want to go to the YMCA, >> you dyslexic fool. I think it's been established that I don't want no >> damn instructors. Anyone with advice on how to personally learn how to >> float yourself would be appreciated, no instructor Nazi's please. > >You are a lippy little f.ck and a troll, no more, no less. Pleased to please you muthafucka! > >> Didn't you see the part where I said I don't want to go to the YMCA, > >> you dyslexic fool. I think it's been established that I don't want no [quoted text clipped - 4 lines] > > Pleased to please you muthafucka! That's hilarious. Psychologically, what is the average age where people stop trying to sugarcoat the bad language by changing the spelling? >> >> Didn't you see the part where I said I don't want to go to the YMCA, >> >> you dyslexic fool. I think it's been established that I don't want no [quoted text clipped - 7 lines] > That's hilarious. Psychologically, what is the average age where people > stop trying to sugarcoat the bad language by changing the spelling? Depends on whether you're Canadian or not... SignaturePopeye "Best thing for him, really, his therapy was going nowhere." -Dr. Hannibal Lector. www.finalprotectivefire.com > >> >> Didn't you see the part where I said I don't want to go to the YMCA, > >> >> you dyslexic fool. I think it's been established that I don't want no [quoted text clipped - 9 lines] > > Depends on whether you're Canadian or not... LOL >> >> >You are a lippy little f.ck and a troll, no more, no less. >> >> [quoted text clipped - 6 lines] > >LOL Only a mental retard would laugh at a joke like that. It makes no sense, is not funny, and I doubt it's even a local Canadian joke that Canadians get, that's how stupid it is. But go ahead keep laughing if it makes your little life better. >>> >> >You are a lippy little f.ck and a troll, no more, no less. >>> >> [quoted text clipped - 12 lines] > Canadians get, that's how stupid it is. But go ahead keep laughing if > it makes your little life better. Just because you don't understand a joke, doesn't mean it's not funny. 5 posts back you apologized to Chris for insulting him, as he had not insulted you. Now you insult him again, boorishly. You're not even bright for a 14 year old. Life will be long for you. >>>> >> >You are a lippy little f.ck and a troll, no more, no less. >>>> >> [quoted text clipped - 23 lines] > > Life will be long for you. That's funny from someone who calls himself Popeye. > >>> >> >You are a lippy little f.ck and a troll, no more, no less. > >>> >> [quoted text clipped - 19 lines] > > Now you insult him again, boorishly. Really? I hadn't even noticed. >> >>> >> >You are a lippy little f.ck and a troll, no more, no less. >> >>> >> [quoted text clipped - 21 lines] > >Really? I hadn't even noticed. That's because your too stupid and don't know how to read. What are you blind? Ok twat I'll insult you again so maybe you'll notice it this time. Go f.ck your grandma you fuckn c.nt! > >Really? I hadn't even noticed. > > That's because your too stupid and don't know how to read. What are > you blind? Ok twat I'll insult you again so maybe you'll notice it > this time. Go f.ck your grandma you fuckn c.nt! That's not an insult. That's a moronic comment/request. An insult would be more like "You should learn from your parents mistakes - try using some birth control." Another good one is "the best parts of you ran down your dad's leg". How about "I could have been your father, but the donkey beat me over the fence." Those are insults. If you prefer the nerdy insult, you might go with something like, "Try insulting me once you've passed kindergarten grammar." At any rate, nothing you say can actually cause me insult, so you have absolutely zero chance of insulting me regardless of how hard you try. >That's not an insult. That's a moronic comment/request. An insult would be >more like "You should learn from your parents mistakes - try using some [quoted text clipped - 7 lines] >At any rate, nothing you say can actually cause me insult, so you have >absolutely zero chance of insulting me regardless of how hard you try. Well if you can't be insulted then it's probably because you're very stupid and don't understand that you've just been insulted. > >That's not an insult. That's a moronic comment/request. An insult would be > >more like "You should learn from your parents mistakes - try using some [quoted text clipped - 10 lines] > Well if you can't be insulted then it's probably because you're very > stupid and don't understand that you've just been insulted. No, Otter, its because in order to be insulted, one woud have to respect, care about, their opinion. There are folks here who could insult me - just to name a few - Popeye, Lee Bell, Scott, Chris Guynn, and thers whom I'll not mention for brevity's sake. You, could not. Carl & Don have been trying for what seems like years, and failing, because I do not respect them or their opinions. Are you clued in now? Dennis On Sun, 9 Jul 2006 08:29:29 -0500, "Dennis \(Icarus\)" <nojunkmail@ever.invalid> wrote: >> >That's not an insult. That's a moronic comment/request. An insult would >be [quoted text clipped - 24 lines] > >Dennis Ok, so then I guess you wouldn't care if I said I f.cked your mother last night and blasted my cum all over her face. She then begged me to cum again only this time in her mouth so she can drink it all up like she usually does from her clients. I stuck my dick all the way down her esophagus and not one drop was wasted. It sure is fun to know I can say that to you without you getting insulted. > On Sun, 9 Jul 2006 08:29:29 -0500, "Dennis \(Icarus\)" > <nojunkmail@ever.invalid> wrote: [quoted text clipped - 34 lines] > her esophagus and not one drop was wasted. It sure is fun to know I > can say that to you without you getting insulted. Why would that be insulting? First, you have zero credibility here. Second, I know that that you're full of sh.t. It might be insulting if it were true, but it's not. My wife used to be a live in nanny. She was caring for a boy (5 years old or so) whose older siblings would make him cry by calling him a girl. He ran to my wife one day crying about this. My wife asked him "are you a girl?". He said no. She then told him that if he knew he wasn't a girl and they knew he wasn't a girl that it really didn't matter if they called him a girl. He never had a problem after that. In this scenario, you are the older siblings except you have less meaning in my life than they did in his. > > On Sun, 9 Jul 2006 08:29:29 -0500, "Dennis \(Icarus\)" > > <nojunkmail@ever.invalid> wrote: [quoted text clipped - 43 lines] > Second, I know that that you're full of sh.t. It might be insulting if it > were true, but it's not. Indeed, its not. I wondered as I wrote the above whether Otter would do something like that. Figured he would. <snip> Dennis > Well if you can't be insulted then it's probably because you're very > stupid and don't understand that you've just been insulted. I didn't say I can't be insulted. I said that *you* can't insult me. There's a HUGE difference. > Life will be long for you. No, it will only -seem- that way. His life expectancy is probably rather short. Unless he can figure out how to tread water after his head has been shoved up his a.s. > Only a mental retard would laugh at a joke like that. It makes no > sense, is not funny, and I doubt it's even a local Canadian joke that > Canadians get, that's how stupid it is. But go ahead keep laughing if > it makes your little life better. In other words, it went so far over your head it reached orbit? > >> >> Didn't you see the part where I said I don't want to go to the YMCA, > >> >> you dyslexic fool. I think it's been established that I don't want no [quoted text clipped - 9 lines] > > Depends on whether you're Canadian or not... The thing is, I doint think he was trying to sugarcoat it. Funny, or sad? Dennis >> >> Pleased to please you muthafucka! >> > [quoted text clipped - 7 lines] > > Funny, or sad? <cough> >>Didn't you see the part where I said I don't want to go to the YMCA, >>you dyslexic fool. I think it's been established that I don't want no >>damn instructors. Anyone with advice on how to personally learn how to >>float yourself would be appreciated, no instructor Nazi's please. > > You are a lippy little f.ck and a troll, no more, no less. Most definatly a troll. The thing is, we all KNOW he is a troll. Trolls can be fun. Who was that guy with the book that no one bought and hooked up a propellor to his... er... backside or something like that?? >>> Didn't you see the part where I said I don't want to go to the YMCA, >>> you dyslexic fool. I think it's been established that I don't want no [quoted text clipped - 7 lines] > Who was that guy with the book that no one bought and hooked up a > propellor to his... er... backside or something like that?? You are probably thinking of Chris Wolfe. I read the book. At best I would give it a C-. >>> Can anyone recommend any good sites on learning how to float and swim? >>> Ones with diagrams would be best. [quoted text clipped - 5 lines] >damn instructors. Anyone with advice on how to personally learn how to >float yourself would be appreciated, no instructor Nazi's please. But you're looking for instruction. Any instructor would tell you what I'm saying. Signaturedillon JAFO > Can anyone recommend any good sites on learning how to float and swim? > Ones with diagrams would be best. It's fun to swim at the Y M C A >> Can anyone recommend any good sites on learning how to float and swim? >> Ones with diagrams would be best. > > It's fun to swim at the Y M C A Thanks, that'll be in my head all night now... :-) SignaturePopeye "Best thing for him, really, his therapy was going nowhere." -Dr. Hannibal Lector. www.finalprotectivefire.com >>> Can anyone recommend any good sites on learning how to float and swim? >>> Ones with diagrams would be best. >> >> It's fun to swim at the Y M C A > > Thanks, that'll be in my head all night now... :-) That's how tiny your brain is, you can't keep the name of a song from taking over it, lol. |
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